⁣It can be hard to know what we really need from a relationship. But the task becomes much simpler if we keep in mind that every relationship requires just three crucial ingredients to work.

⁣We’re given very little guidance on how to choose our partners and tend to leave it to that mysterious force we know as ‘instinct’. However, it truly pays to be a little more rational in this area and work out how our instincts operate and why they push us towards some people and away from others

⁣Those of us in relationships suffer from an ignorance of what other people’s relationships are really like. We should recognise that episodes of difficulty and ambivalence are not the exception, but the norm.